Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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