Have you finally orgasmed yet?
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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