I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Shame - the story of my life.
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