I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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