I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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