You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
