There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
