If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize