Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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