hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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