Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
