i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
birth control should be required to get into college
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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