Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
