Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Acid is not a monday night drug
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
