It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
