Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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