Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
