sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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