i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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