i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
