last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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