I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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