There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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