im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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