You're a womanizer and a bitch.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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