well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Boobs are out for the taking
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
