the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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