You can't motorboat a personality
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
