Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
