piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i don't like sucking hair
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
