where am i from again
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
