Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
