I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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