Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You are a genius and a whore.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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