i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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