508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
