Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.