Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
