we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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