Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
