finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
