READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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