The brown eye won't let me do that either.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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