fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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