I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
