It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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