i think my tv is drunk
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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