her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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