dude i'm inner monologue high
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
do herpes really smell.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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