Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
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