Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..

  (951): View more from California

  u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!

  (661): View more from California

  i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u

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  (661): i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break.. (951): u hav a 3 hour lunch break?! (661): i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u http://tfl.nu/1ary
  Replies (40) Good night (8253) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??

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  (978): Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"?? http://tfl.nu/v3ie
  Replies (19) Good night (3362) Bad night (2194)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work

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  (862): just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work http://tfl.nu/zbvu
  Replies (3) Good night (2503) Bad night (1145)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't

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  (310): I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't http://tfl.nu/g41b
  Replies (13) Good night (2899) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.

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  (864): and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot. http://tfl.nu/9hr6
  Replies (10) Good night (2402) Bad night (1756)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.

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  (310): I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in. http://tfl.nu/n54h
  Replies (6) Good night (6037) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?

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  (318): would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase? http://tfl.nu/h5qz
  Replies (6) Good night (1539) Bad night (1093)
• Favorite

  (830): View more from Texas

  Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.

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  (830): Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point. http://tfl.nu/e159
  Replies (13) Good night (710) Bad night (1422)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.

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  (480): I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it. http://tfl.nu/wwgo
  Replies (5) Good night (1301) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm

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  (585): Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm http://tfl.nu/bhwz
  Replies (9) Good night (674) Bad night (3525)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.

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  (515): Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen. http://tfl.nu/hels
  Replies (4) Good night (897) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?

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  (254): The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left? http://tfl.nu/ml3m
  Replies (6) Good night (634) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird

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  (315): dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird http://tfl.nu/6em9
  Replies (1) Good night (886) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.

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  (727): Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach. http://tfl.nu/4bma
  Replies (2) Good night (264) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.

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  (304): You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him. http://tfl.nu/a4qu
  Replies (1) Good night (450) Bad night (259)

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