It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
