Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
My cat gives me a boner
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
