I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
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After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
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Every concussion has its silver lining
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.