even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.