Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
